A Moment In Time That Lasts Forever
by Bethany
URL: http://www.stargateslash.com/asb/bethany7/momentin.php
Summary: Horatio and Eric spend time with H's friends, Jack O'Neill & Dr Daniel Ballard
Horatio knew he'd always loved the man. But he also knew he could never tell him that... Apart from anything, he knew Eric would assume that he'd used Eric's sister, Marisol, when he'd married her... Yet that just hadn't been the case... Horatio had known he was bisexual for a good many years, and he hadn't been able to help but see the same elements of gentle heart, force of nature spirit and quietly burning strength of courage in Marisol Delko, that he'd always seen in Eric Delko, almost from the moment all those years ago, when Eric told him that he needed to invest in a pair of sunglasses! It was over those glasses, that Eric gave him, chose for him - through them, catching glimpses behind them whether he meant to, or not, that Horatio Caine had fallen in love, in love with Eric Delko...
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Horatio Caine had been invited to stay with his friends, Jack O'Neill, and Dr. Daniel Ballard... Jack had retired from the police force a few years back, one too many old injuries beginning to complain... He filled his days now with his carpentry and pottery business, and his writing... Jack O'Neill had become a bit of a writer! Parodying his own life, in a sense in stories about a guy called Ernest Pratt and his alter ego Nicodemus Legend!
Doctor Daniel Ballard, his partner, was a book writer, too. It is how they had met. Daniel was a Doctor of Archaeology, Anthropology, Linguistics, and History, and their paths had crossed on the book circuit because Catherine Littlefield, a friend of Daniel's family, had introduced them. Daniel's parents, Melburn and Oma Ballard, (his father had taken his wife's family name, instead of his own, Paxon , because he was far closer to her parents than his, who seemed unbothered by their own son) had died when he was a child, in a work related accident, when an exhibit they were reconstructing in that museum, fell. Daniel had grown up with his maternal grandparents from that moment.
When Eric had recovered, and was allowed out of hospital, Horatio thought that the man could still use some down time, so he arranged for Eric to visit Jack and Daniel with him...
Horatio rarely let his guard down, rarely spoke of emotion, and Jack O'Neill was the same... But they were just a little drunk, and alone in the armchairs in Jack's living room. Daniel had gone to bed, and Eric had gone to bed also, in one of the guest rooms... Suddenly, Horatio started telling Jack all about his sun glasses, what they meant to him, because Eric had bought them, and everything that went with that... He mentioned Tim, Tim Speedle, whom he had begun to have feelings for, but whom had been cruelly stolen away by the murderous actions of a bunch of the criminals they chased, and about how and why he'd fallen for Marisol, but he always found his feelings for Eric again, because they never really left him... He did feel a bit embarrassed, and Jack felt a tad awkward, he could tell, but the drink helped them both, as they sat there with there brandy glasses, across from each other in the armchairs... "If I tell him," Horatio mused, "he will think I used his sister...And, she," he began, looking heavenward as he did so, "will think the same..."
"Or maybe, she's just heard everything you said, from where she is now..." Jack tried to believe in Heaven. He had to. "And she understands, because she knows you... You and Eric were both very important to her when she was here. I can't imagine why that would have changed, not even with what you've just told me..."
There was a soft tap on the doorway, pulled ajar, into the living room then... Both Horatio and Jack looked toward it.
"Eric..." Horatio murmured, fear and concern running through him.
"Did you ever really wonder why I'm so comfortable here with you, and Jack, and Daniel?" Eric asked H, from the doorway...
"I think that's my cue to leave, and go and find my husband..." Jack mused, extricating himself from his armchair, and slipping from the room without much fuss, brandy glass left on the table beside his armchair...
When he had gone from out of sight, Eric walked into the room, pushing the door further, 'til it was almost entirely closed. He stood there and looked at H. "Did you?"
"Because you're a good man, Eric..." Horatio stood, and looked into Eric's eyes.
"It's because I... Because I've always wondered, Horatio. You made me wonder. I've always thought I was bi curious, but you, you actually make me want to find out... I felt the same way about you, as you did, as you do, about me, almost from the first time we met..."
"And now?" Horatio asked.
"I still do... But you married Marisol, and I'm afraid I'll be a traitor to my sister if you and I, if we..."
"I know. Me, too!" Horatio truthfully told him. "I honestly did love her, enough to marry her, Eric."
"And now?" Eric asked.
"She was my wife In that sense, I'll always love her But believe it or not, I'm not strong enough to be alone..." Horatio confided in Eric. "I need someone, and I can't help but wish that someone could be you But I will never, ever ask you to do anything that you might feel you need forgiveness for, Eric Not ever!" Horatio affirmed.
"I know..." Eric paused. "I'm being undoubtedly selfish here, but what Jack said, I hope that's right..." Eric looked Heavenward, too, in that moment, tears in his eyes for a myriad of reasons, not least of which the fact that he wanted, he craved to be with Horatio, and didn't want to have to hold out.
"You heard that much?" Horatio queried.
"All of it, H. I'm sorry about Tim. I didn't realise. I didn't know you were Bi even... After you told me to join the force, and the crime lab, because of my powers of observation, and I didn't have a clue about you, H..!"
Horatio laughed gently. "It's OK, Eric. Nothing to forgive!"
"But will this be something to forgive, if we do this, the whole us thing, is it like saying we're glad she died, to make way for us" Eric tearfully wanted to know.
Tears flowed down Horatio's face. He reached for his wallet and took out the photo of Marisol, with him and Eric...
Eric looked at the photo, too. "Now what, Marisol?" he asked her. He looked to Horatio. "She would want us to be happy, but to choose this path to happiness; is it wrong?"
"I don't know, Eric. I'd like to think not, because I do love you..." Horatio spoke to Eric honestly.
"I'm in the same situation here, H, 'cos I love you, y'know, more than I ever loved Calleigh, at least in that sense..." Eric confessed, feeling guilty for Calleigh, as well as for his sister, and worrying that H, with no intent to use or betray Marisol, meant, (that he trusted!) had always, similarly been more in love with him... Had they both used her as a way to stay closer together, even unintentionally He thought not, but still...
Horatio stood there, white as a sheet, because he was in such a quandary of not knowing what to do, but he knew what he wanted to do... In that moment, he heard Marisol's voice. "Be happy, you two!" in his mind, and though he didn't trust that his own selfish psyche hadn't put her words there, he had to act on them He was only a man, a man who loved Eric Delko with every fibre of his being, clichι as it was to say it like that... He stepped forward, and, first, held Eric gently in his arms, looking into his eyes again...
Eric, just a man, a man who was in love with Horatio Caine, could hear or was imagining his sister telling him to be happy, to let himself and Horatio look out for each other, care for each other, keep each other safe, well, and happy...So, he met the man he loved the rest of the way, and they kissed, in Jack O'Neill's living room, Eric Delko and Horatio Caine kissed for the first time No more hiding their true feelings behind and in a pair of sunglasses, not anymore...
The End
Author's Note: I make no money, and mean to step on no one's toes at all,by writing my stories... Feedback welcome as long as it is always polite.
